It’s hard to believe that the girl in seventh grade that was terrified to go to a new school next year is standing before you here speaking today. But I’m so grateful for this opportunity and I want to thank every teacher, every school personnel, and every person that has made our high school experience memorable. But most of all, I’d like to thank you all, the graduating class of 2023, for making that terrified girl feel so incredibly welcomed in eighth grade. Because of those special moments when Mr. Coger called me The Huntress in Algebra I, or the Renaissance video we filmed in Katie’s backyard, and even the DC trip when it poured rain at the baseball game, I knew I’d found my place right here in North Reading.
With the intimidating social scene being conquered, my next challenge was academics. Although Algebra I was the most fun class, it was also the most difficult and I won’t lie, some of those tests did humble me. And of course, anyone freshman year that has had Oosting for History knows the burden. That class baffled me at times, I might’ve even argued it was worse than Algebra I. But that taste of academic hardship only sparked even more interest and a yearning for my next challenge.
So naturally I took 4 APs junior year, the rest honors. I was in that perfect sweet spot of feeling productive but still having time to unwind. I relished in the moments when Ms. Jolibert would Irish step dance on St. Patrick’s Day and then still give us a killer test on the immune system. I had found that heavenly middle ground. But one conversation shifted my entire perspective.
We were in APUSH, and Nick asked me how many APs I was taking and I told him 4, a casual interaction. But he responded by telling me I might be top of the class for that alone. No longer was I trying to challenge myself, I was competing. I was determined to succeed and disturbed that perfect balance in favor of working harder. I ignored the warnings I got from various teachers and I kissed the notion of enjoying my senior year goodbye. I took 5 APs this time, three of which were a killer trio in Calculus BC, Chem, and Physics, and my other electives were focused on science or math.
I thought I’d be fine, that it would be just like last year. But calculus, it was my Achilles heel. I studied and put so much effort into every problem but sometimes I’d still come back with a grade threatening my GPA. And as AP Chemistry students know as the year progresses it gets worse and worse and then worse again. My friends and I even joked about what senior year felt like, but I’ll spare you the gore. Even after I got accepted into college I didn’t falter. I felt like even when victories came, I was still left to be beaten back down again.
Behind the near-perfect grades were days when the tears would fall onto my homework. And skipping sports games because of work. And the feeling of choosing academics over my social life. And that sinking pit of stress inside of me that never seemed to leave. But you know that story, you know those feelings. You’ve heard the warnings of burnout and the need for time for yourself. And quite frankly, those ideas are right.
But in a weird way, I’m glad I pushed myself to the brink of burnout, I’m glad I did break down because I couldn’t handle it anymore, and I’m glad I felt it all because I never want to do it again — I never want to feel those things again. The failure, the struggle, the stress, it’s painful but it’s how I learned. It’s what taught me my limits and where that perfect middle-ground lies.
Moments like these, speaking in front of the class or getting that award, or graduating high school, or even something as small as feeling productive after cleaning your room, those moments are integral to success and growth. But so are those moments in Algebra I where we quoted Mr. Coger’s sayings, or acted out The Crucible in B Block McCarthy while laughing hysterically, or in AP Lit with Mr. Putnam when he imitates a freshman. It’s all about balancing the two perfectly.
Wherever life takes you next year, find that balance. Work to make every word of that paper perfection but still say yes to getting crumbl on a random Wednesday. Give your full effort and attention to your job but then spontaneously go to Portsmouth and eat ice cream as it drips down to your elbows. Study tirelessly for that dreadful organic chemistry test but then go to your best friend’s house for homemade pasta with their family. That cheesy expression, you can have your cake and eat it too, it does apply. There is always a balance to be found.
And when I look out into the crowd today, I see people that will make a true difference in the world. Our class has done so much for this school, has made so many positive changes, and has been strident leaders. And I know when we leave here today that will not stop, instead that passion inside of us is going to flourish and push us to do incredible things. And that’s where I challenge you to find your own balance and achieve true happiness whatever your next step is.
Rain showers fail to dampen the resilient spirit of the NRHS Class of 2023